My Story: Realization
It was then that I realized that I might be dealing with cancer. This realization occurred at two o'clock in the morning, and I nearly blew a gasket. I screamed, I cried, and I read. I read everything I could find on the internet about testicular cancer. My father had died two years prior of prostate cancer, and I was in shock that that I could be battling the same type of disease. Later, I found it very interesting that it took me those weeks to realize what was happening to me. There's a great line in the movie American Beauty that I find very appropriate: "Never underestimate the power of denial." How true.
I had the orchiectomy, the first surgery I have ever had,
then proceeded to recuperate and stress for the next six days waiting
for the pathology report. Waiting for a "verdict" for six
days was excrutiating. Unfortunately, the report confirmed my worst
fear:
I had cancer.